Regret
by iced mint-o-chino
Summary: Jordan tries to fix things after the ring mishap. Post Embracealbe You. WoodyJordan


Regret

Disclaimer: I don't own Crossing Jordan. Don't sue. I'm broke.

Summary: Jordan wants to fix things after the ring mishap.

A/N: A little something I thought of after "Embraceable You," in Jordan's POV. Please review.

Woody stormed out. I could tell he was angry. Woody was the kind of guy that wouldn't admit that he had been hurt. To be honest, I wanted to accept that ring. That's why I called him back in. To apologize. I wanted to tell him I was ready. But, now we're back to square one. All the ground we covered has been lost and its all because I was scared.

I sat at my desk and stared into space. I was the only one left in the morgue. I had been sitting here alone for a while now. My cheeks were tear stained. All I could do was blame myself for the pain we both were feeling. I began to cry again. A couple tears came sliding down. I wiped them away quickly. I felt myself slipping into a downward spiral. I had been down this road before and I knew the old patterns would soon return. If I kept this up, I would be halfway across the country in a week. I didn't want to run away this time. I was safe here, in Boston, with Woody. For the first time since I could remember, I was comfortable in my own skin. I wasn't going to lose the feeling or the man that helped me find it.

I got up from my desk and made my way out of the morgue. I walked through the parking lot. I climbed into my car and started the ignition. I drove home. After showering and changing clothes, I attempted to call Woody. I got the voicemail.

"Hey it's Woody, I'm not home right now. Leave a message and I'll get back to you. BEEP." The sound of his voice made my heart ache.

"Woody. It's me. I know you're there. Please pick up or…or call me back. Please." I barley managed to get out the message. I called his cell. No answer. I got up and walked into my kitchen. I needed a little liquid confidence. I downed my third whiskey and grabbed my keys.

I drove around for little while and somehow ended up at Woody's. I sat in the car for a little to muster up the courage. Finally, I got out of the car and went up to Woody's floor. I knocked, lightly at first, and eventually a little harder. I had a lump in my throat and the tears were welling up when he opened the door.

"What Jordan?" He had been drinking. I could always tell. I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out. I broke down and started to cry.

"No, Jordan. Don't do this. Please, I can't do this right now." I only nodded and turned leave. I was really trying to maintain some control over myself.

"I'm sorry," I managed to whisper as I turned to walk away.

"Jordan," he said with the tone that can always make me weak at the knees. I turned to face him. "Come here." He opened his arms. I fell into him. I lost all control over myself and sobbed.

"I'm sorry, Woody." I stuttered between gasps. He told me to hush and whispered some calming words.

"Come inside. Let's talk for a minute." Woody said. I could tell he was upset but his tone never changed. He always put me first. We entered his apartment and sat down on his couch.

"Jordan, I know what I said earlier upset you and…" before he could finished I stopped him.

"No, Woody. What I said upset you and I'm sorry. I got what I deserved. I care about you more than anything… anyone but, I'm so scared. I'm scared to put myself out there. I'm scared to hurt you. I want this- us- so badly but I don't know how to commit. I don't know how to take that step." Woody took my hand in his.

"We have been dancing around for ever. I wanted to take that next step. I think I took more of a leap than a step. I want us, too. Maybe we should just…take it slow. We can start over." I nodded and leaned in close. I rested my head on his chest.

"Woody… thank you. You are the only one whose ever stuck around to deal with me."

"I can't imagine my life without you… as much as that scares me." I laughed a little. Woody wiped a tear from my cheek. "It's all going to work out, Jo. I promise." I smiled and closed my eyes.

"I'm glad we're starting over. Maybe this time I can do it right."

FIN


End file.
